I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
