it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
