Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
