I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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