i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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