You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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