Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
