Kareoke will never be a sober sport
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
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