Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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