I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
