i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize