Your tits are I can't wait for
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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