So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
