margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
i believe in u and ur pee
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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