did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
