I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
