no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
