If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
