She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
