i jhust puked up my retainher.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
This is the high leading the old right now
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
