Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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