Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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