Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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