ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
