Just fell off a train. Bad.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
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My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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