Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
