thus making me awesome and them whores
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
