I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I just googled if crying burns calories
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize