If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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