could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
i need to put some appletini on your dick
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.