did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
porn star boner night. come get it.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.