How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize