I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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