can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize