hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
