If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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