I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
