we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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