she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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