Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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