Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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