Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize
