She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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