Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize