Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
