with your own penis?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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