If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
