he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
She tied me up with her honor cords...
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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