As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
