Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
