I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I'm going to jail i love you
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
