So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
